There are people who prefer to say "Yes," and there are people who prefer to say "No." Those who say "Yes" are rewarded by the adventures they have, and those who say "No" are rewarded by the safety they attain. There are far more "No" sayers around than "Yes" sayers, but you can train one type to behave like the other.

I can't help but put pressure on myself to be a yes-sayer. Perhaps it's the vague belief that saying yes will lead to a fuller life and range of experiences and that saying "no" is the easy option. And somehow, the easy option in my mind can seem like the wrong option. That's why I liked Keith Johnstone's framing for yes-sayers and no-sayers, as it clearly shows the rewards for taking either route in a decision, not just one.

If you are improvising, saying yes and accepting offers takes you to situations that may not feel comfortable but give you new experiences.

Saying no keeps you where you are. Your situation is known and safe, and you feel good for that reason.

In life, we never have to be exclusively yes or exclusively no. And it doesn't have to be white-water kayaking for yes-sayers and reading books at home for no-sayers. But certainly, there are different joys in each path. I love both: the nerves and excitement of new experiences and the comfort and safety of the known and predictable. We needn't bucket ourselves into one or the other.

An adventure, even a microadventure, almost by definition, is the result of saying yes. And, like Type II fun, it can be rewarding and fulfilling. But balancing adventure with the safety and calm of staying in one's comfort zone at times feels nice to me.

"The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces"—in my book Big Ideas Little Pictures

Abraham Maslow, known for Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, shared:

"One can choose to go back toward safety or forward toward growth. Growth must be chosen again and again; fear must be overcome again and again."

The quote is from Keith Johnstone's book Impro: Improvisation and the Theatre, Theatre Arts Books, 1979, as quoted in Improv Wisdom by Patricia Ryan Madson.

Yes Sayers are Rewarded by Adventure, No Sayers are Rewarded by Safety

Jólabókaflóð, or Christmas Book Flood, is the charming Icelandic tradition of giving books as gifts, opening them on Christmas Eve, and settling in to read them together, ideally with hot chocolate or other warming wintry drink.

The "flood" refers to the traditional release of books in the months leading up to Christmas. While there may be a book flood without gifting them on Christmas eve, it's such a nice extension that it seems worthy of its adapted meaning.

Iceland has a long literary tradition, and a high percentage of Icelanders both read regularly and become authors themselves. Jólabókaflóð has its roots in various causes to do with wars, rationing, ancient sagas, and, I'd guess, also long winter nights.

Jólabókaflóð

How many books will you read in a lifetime? If you’re a pretty dedicated reader, you may be able to get through one book a week, so roughly 50 books a year. Over 70 years of reading at that pace, you’d read around 3,500 books—counting comfort rereads like Harry Potter for the third time. I only know a few people who actually manage to read like that, so presumably, for most of us, the likely book reads we will manage is much less than that.

To put that number in context, your local bookstore has around 30,000 books. So if you were to use your entire life’s reading in that store, you’d still only be a bit over 1/10th of the way through. That’s a lot of books you didn’t even get a chance to start.

I won’t deny that 3,500 books is a lot of books, but whatever you do, there will be far more books that you just don’t have time to get to than those you do find time for. So, like for movies, I think it seems wise to be at least a little thoughtful about what books you choose to pick up, and what books you decide to go on to finish.

As the author James Joyce said: "Life is too short to read a bad book."

In the course of making this, I learned that in 2010 the Google Books team estimated there were around 130 million books to choose from.

3,500 Lifetime reads

Tsundoku is a beautiful Japanese word for acquiring and piling up books without reading them.

It is constructed from two words that loosely mean "piling up" and "reading."

The sketch is loosely based on my parents’ bedroom while I grew up, both of whom are experienced and talented tsundoku-ers/tsundokists.

This sketch, along with many other word-related sketches, appears in my book Big Ideas Little Pictures

Tsundoku

These are a super useful trick to increase the chances of action, be it your own others. Essentially, a vague intention of “I plan to do that,” is much less likely to be followed-through on than if you get specific. It takes out the ambiguity of when and where you’ll do something because that’s already decided. For example, asking voters simple questions like how they’ll get to the polling station has been shown to increase turnout on the day. You can use this to your own advantage too — get specific with yourself to help you get things done, be it how and when you’ll workout, or when you’ll study or whatever.

Here’s a simple template for implementation intentions you could try:

I learned this, and many more tips, from James Clear’s book Atomic Habits, all about how to create good habits and break ones.

Implementation intentions

Winnie the Pooh teaches us how to speak plainly and avoid Owl Speak.

There’s a surprising amount of wisdom in A. A. Milne’s classic stories of Winnie-the-Pooh. If you haven’t read them for a long time, you could do much worse than try them again.

As one small example, I find there’s a lot of Owl Speak around as we get older, where we could all probably benefit from a dose of Pooh’s simplicity. Owl Speak includes never using a short, simple word when a long and complicated one would do. For example, in one revealing exchange, Owl explains:

“Well, the customary procedure in such cases is as follows.”

“What does Crustimoney Proseedcake mean?” said Pooh.

…”It means, the Thing to Do.” says Owl.

We learn more and more Owl Speak the more time we spend in school, only to have to work to remove it when we are older.

All the Winnie-the-Pooh books are lovely to read: Winnie-the-Pooh, The House at Pooh Corner, When we Were Very Young, and Now we are Six. Both quotes are from The House at Pooh Corner. Or, if you prefer to have the wisdom called out, you could try The Tao of Pooh, by Benjamin Hoff.

This sketch was updated for my book Big Ideas Little Pictures

How to speak plainly, by Pooh Bear

How to get into flow at work? Match challenge with skills.

When your work is too hard for your skill you experience anxiety.

When your skill is too high for the work you experience boredom.

When your skill is matched with the challenge of the work then you can experience flow.

This simple framework comes from the deep insights of the work of Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi and his book Good Business.

Match challenge with skills for flow at work

Eat food. Not too much. Mostly plants

Time to cut down. From Kim John Payne's Simplicity Parenting.

Books sketches